Why I hate divorces…

On Behalf of | Mar 17, 2012 | Child Custody, Divorce

I really do not like divorces. This might sound weird coming from a Pennsylvania Divorce lawyer– I mean it’s my profession- it’s my livelihood. But, in reality, there just is a lot I do not like about the whole process.

First of all, you have two people who presumably once loved one another, who now really do not like each other. Hate might be a strong word, but the truth of the matter is that most of time the ex spouses truly hate each other. And, we all know that nothing good comes from hate.

Divorces destroy the family unit. Children are inextricably affected by the process, regardless of the age of the children. Custody fights, entailing custody hearing after custody hearing, do nothing more than further the divide between the ex spouses and possibly alienate the children from one of the spouses.

If couple can not come to a custody agreement, the Court will ultimately decide how much time a child spends with each parent. Although, the Courts attempt very hard to be fair, the Court telling you how much time you will spend with your child in a given week can sometimes be very hard to accept.

Secondly, the household generally goes from being a combined two income family unit from which the single monthly living expenses are paid, to two separate family units, each now having ½ the income and double the living expenses with each spouse having their own household. This economic dynamic usually presents a tremendous financial burden for both sides resulting in more pressure and tension between the parties.

I just read recently that a study has found that divorce couples do not live as long because of health issues that come about because of the divorce. Such illnesses as hyper tension, high blood pressure and depression are just a few of the afflictions that are customarily a result of a heated divorce.

No-divorces are no fun, but if you are going through a divorce or are contemplating a divorce, I can only leave you with a quote from Mr. Miyagi, in the movie-“The Next Karate Kid”-

“Fighting not good. But, if must fight, win.”


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