Divorces are often difficult for all parties, and it's not unusual for the divorcing spouses to get petty -- especially as divorce proceedings get underway and present all sorts of points of contention. As tempting as it may be to involve children in these battles, it can be very damaging to both the emotional well-being of the children and each parent's relationship with their children.
Pittsburgh divorce lawyers note that there are several self-imposed rules parents should apply to themselves to ensure that their children remain a priority and are as unaffected by the divorce as possible. Following these rules will help children better handle the divorce of their parents in the short term as well as the long term.
The first thing parents can do to protect their children is to keep them out of any fights or disagreements. Children can't help you resolve any issues with your ex-spouse, so there's no point resorting to using your children as pawns or recruiting them to help you out. It will only lead to negative outcomes.
Children will deal with the divorce in different ways, and regardless of their approach it is important that you let them go about their grief in their own way. For some children this may mean staying completely silent on the subject. Others may try to continue living their daily life as close to normal as possible, while some children may have a reel of questions and expect honest answers from both of their parents. Regardless of their approach, it is important that you allow children to remain neutral parties between their parents -- this will help them become comfortable with the current situation.
This leads in to the final point, which is that children have a right to be happy after the divorce. This is the ultimate goal for everyone involved -- to reconcile with the circumstances and find a way to be happy -- and your children should never be held back from that pursuit.
Source: Huffington Post "A Divorced Child's Bill of Rights" Jan. 6, 2012